Economic recession woes? No problem! Get yourself a money plant. Some people call them fortune plants. Others say lucky bamboo.
None of these descriptive terms, however, cast a glint of recognition in the eyes of a garden lady (GL) working outdoors not too many weekends ago at City People’s plant store on Madison Avenue.
My encounter with a hostile garden lady
DK: Hi!
GL: …
DK: Um, can you tell me about fortune plants?
GL: What?
DK: Um. They’re like, this tall, and… they’re bamboo!
GL: …
DK: My mom calls them “money plants.” She has four or something.
GL: Those, yes I know.
DK: You do?! Oh, great. See, ours… ours isn’t doing so well.
GL: Those are grown for, how do you say. They’re icons. Icons, yes.
DK: Icons?
GL: Yes. They’re not taken… they don’t have lots of… Nevermind. Do you have yours in soil?
DK: Um… no. It was a gift. It came in water.
GL: Have you changed the water.
DK: …
GL: Have you cleaned it?
DK: …
GL: IS IT ROTTING?
DK: … um. i don’t know, exactly…
GL: You have to take care of it! You cannot just not plant it in the ground! Plant… plants need nutrients. They need to grow!
DK: So, what should I do?
GL: Give it some fertilizer!
DK: Okay.
GL: And pot it!
DK: Okay.
GL: You cannot just!… you cannot just let them go without nutrition! They cannot survive! Plants are just like you and me! They need nutrients! They cannot survive on just AIR!
DK: …
GL: Like you, could you survive on just AIR? Maybe if you were… superhuman or something! Yes, you could!
DK: Um.
GL: !
DK: …
GL: !!!
DK: Um. Are you… are you being serious?
The redemption
We found out from another lady in the indoor section (houseplants, center aisle) that you shouldn’t add fertilizer. So I instantly returned the fertilizer I just bought. Then she said repotting it is optional. Fortunately (fortune!!! hoo!), yes, fortunately I hadn’t gotten to the point of buying a whole new pot and one of those bags of soil that only come in sizes too big for small time houseplant owners the likes of Design Kompany.
The good news is, our little money-pot is super healthy looking, rejuvenated, and appears to be doing just great.
Now we’ll just sit back, and watch the checks roll in.
Too funny. The garden ladies at City People Sand Point can be a bit hostile at times too… maybe it’s part of their training!?
Let me know the next time you need some of that potting stuff that comes in the big bags, I’ve usually got some lying around.
very nice
Thanks for the comments!
@Richard,
Bags of potting soil. Awesome.
This really helped… thank you very much!